Fresh Perspective
“Do you know what I’m craving? A little perspective. That’s it. I’d like some fresh, clear, well-seasoned perspective. Can you suggest a good wine to go with that?”
— Anton Ego, Ratatouille
As chefs, we always talk about the freshness of our ingredients. We look for the best because we know fresh is best. Period.
There’s an old saying we use about coming ingredients coming through the back door:
“You can put lipstick on a pig… It’s still a pig.”
We say that to mean the product is shit. No matter what you do to it, the result will still be shit. If you’ve been in the business, you’ve heard it and you know exactly what it means. It’s one of those hard lessons we all learn.
Those “tricks of the trade” are passed down from the generation before us. In the industry, we often call that mentorship. But for me, mentorship is so much more.
Here’s how I define the relationship between mentor and mentee in our world:
🔪 Mentor:
A mentor in the culinary world is typically a seasoned chef or experienced professional who provides guidance, knowledge, and support to less experienced cooks or chefs. They share their expertise on techniques, kitchen management, and the business side of the industry. More than just a teacher, a mentor also helps mentees navigate the personal challenges that come with a demanding career, offering advice, inspiration, and a model of professional conduct. Mentors often shape a mentee’s culinary identity and career path in ways they may not even realize at the time.
🔥 Mentee:
A mentee is usually a cook or junior chef who’s eager to learn and grow under the guidance of someone more experienced. They want to refine their skills, understand the complexities of the kitchen, and develop professionally and personally. A mentee looks to a mentor not just for technical know-how but also for career advice, industry insight, and, often, life guidance.
In this industry, the mentor-mentee relationship is intense and hands-on. The mentor passes down not just recipes and techniques, but also the ethos and soul of the kitchen. It’s a bond built on mutual respect, shared passion, and a commitment to growth.
And that relationship should be symbiotic.
In a healthy mentorship, learning flows both ways. Mentors share their experience and wisdom, but mentees bring fresh eyes, new ideas, and skills that challenge the status quo. This dynamic keeps both parties evolving, especially in an industry that moves as fast as ours.
Being open to learning from your mentees isn’t just helpful—it’s necessary. It keeps you relevant. It keeps you human. It keeps you from becoming the crusty old cook yelling at clouds.
But there’s a dangerous, slippery slope too.
Because of the closeness, sometimes boundaries blur. Lines get crossed. And that can send the whole relationship spiraling. I’ve had mentees go down paths I disagreed with. Full disclosure? Some of those choices hit my soul hard.
You start questioning yourself:
Why the hell do I keep giving my heart to people who might not stick around, or worse, go off the rails?
It’s a brutal place to be.
But here’s the truth: the culinary world is relentless. It often attracts people who thrive in high-pressure chaos, and sometimes, that comes with addiction, instability, or deep emotional wounds.
That’s where boundaries matter.
You can only do so much as a mentor. You’re there to guide, support, and offer what you’ve learned—but you can’t walk the path for them. Not every mentee will stay the course or reach the potential you see in them. That’s not a reflection of your value or effort.
It also doesn’t mean you failed.
Every mentee’s journey is different. Some of the lessons you offer might not land until years later. The fact that I still reach out to people like Alan Lazar shows that the impact is real, even if it takes time to be felt.
💡 So, what have I learned from decades in this game? Here’s the short list:
Select Mentees Wisely
Be intentional about who you mentor. Make sure there’s mutual respect and shared commitment to the process.
Set Clear Boundaries and Expectations
Define what mentorship looks like—goals, communication, and limits. That clarity creates a healthy space for both of you.
Acknowledge the Non-Linear Nature of Growth
Success isn’t a straight line. Growth can be messy, slow, or silent. Your impact might not be visible right away, but it’s there.
Focus on the Journey, Not Just the Outcome
The process itself is meaningful. Support and guidance are the key to success, not just the mentee’s accolades.
Protect Your Own Energy
You can’t pour from an empty cup. Take care of yourself. Set limits. Find your support network, too.
Accept the Natural Flow
Mentees might leave, change paths, or outgrow the relationship. That’s normal. Let it happen with grace and pride.
If you notice a mentee struggling, don’t try to be everything for them. Help guide them toward someone who can help—whether that’s a sponsor, a therapist, or another mentor. We say “it takes a village” to raise a child… why wouldn’t it take a village to help someone grow into their best self?
Being a mentor doesn’t mean you carry the whole burden. It means you help them build a network of support so they can keep growing, without burning yourself out in the process.
Who planted a seed in you that still grows today? Tag them.
And if you’re mentoring someone now, what’s the fresh perspective they bring to your life?
In the end, mentorship—like great cooking—isn’t about control. It’s about balance. It’s about seasoning.
And sometimes, all it takes to realign… is a little fresh, clear, well-seasoned perspective.
