“I don’t know what to do.”

That’s what my friend said when they opened up about their kid struggling with depression.

I didn’t give advice right away. I didn’t try to fix anything.

I just sat there and listened.

When they asked, “What do I say to them?”

I asked them one simple thing:

“When you’re feeling low and someone says, ‘Why would you think that? You’re so smart, so talented…’—what do you actually hear?”

You probably just heard Charlie Brown’s teacher in your head, right?

“Wah wah wah wahhh.”

There was a little silence, and they said,

“I hear: dumbass.”

And I said,

“If someone spoke to your kid like that, what would you do?”

Again, they went quiet.

So I asked,

“Why do we talk to ourselves that way?”

⸻

Look, I’m not a therapist. I’m just a chef. But I’ve been in that dark place. I know what it feels like to be buried in your own thoughts, to feel like no one hears you.

So I told them this:

“You don’t need to give answers. You just need to acknowledge what they’re feeling.”

They said, “But I do! I tell them they’re smart, they’re strong…”

And I stopped them.

“Yeah, I know. We all do that. We mean well. But when someone’s depressed, they’re not thinking straight. They’re not hearing that. It’s like yelling encouragement into a sealed room—they can’t hear you.”

Instead, try this:

“I see you. I see that you’re hurting. I won’t pretend to know what you’re feeling.

But I’m here. You lead the way. If you want to talk, I’ll listen. If you want help, I’ll show up.”

That alone can give someone the thing they’ve been craving:

To be seen. To be heard. To know they’re not alone.

⸻

This month is Men’s Mental Health Month.

It’s not about being strong. It’s about being real.

And maybe—just maybe—listening a little more.

That could change someone’s life.

Maybe even save it.

#JustOneLife

#MensMentalHealthMonth

#CraveableObsessed

#MentalHealthInTheKitchen

#ISeeYou